The Lone Stocking

Loneliness. Sadness. Are those the two words that come to mind when you think of Christmas? Maybe your loved one isn't there to share a cup of eggnog or laugh at your attempt to sing Jingle Bells without being able to remember all the lyrics.

One of the hardest times of my life that should have been celebratory was when I gave birth to my second son. My husband Jerrad deployed a few weeks before our little boy was born. I compare Jerrad telling me he wouldn't be there by my side cheering me on to a man texting his fiance at the alter. The bride to be would shake her head in disbelief as she read what he wrote. He decided not to show up for the wedding and would instead just sign the paperwork later so they could legally be married.

Through a lot of prayer and the support of family and friends, I was able to let go of the sadness so that it wouldn't eclipse the joy of our child's birth. I used a webcamera and headphones when I delivered so Jerrad could be involved. It was very difficult, but I got through it. Finally, five months later Jerrad was able to hold our blonde boy for the first time.

If you are struggling with loneliness, discouragement, or just need a little encouragement listen to the speech I gave about my experience. Every pain can be turned into healing. Those dark nights can be the doorway to a tomorrow you've never imagined if you don't quit.  

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